To the city I love

11th January 2009: I wake up a little unsure of my surroundings. I turn and look out the large window and see, from my 13th floor perch, the hustle and bustle of a familiar city below. I’m groggy from the exhaustion of the last few days spent in relocating, depressed about leaving the place I called home in Bangalore, missing the few close friends I made over the past four years, the friendly neighbours, everything. Yet, there is this unmistakable spark of excitement growing within me as I look out the window. A thousand memories flood my thoughts. College, hostel, friends, family, journalism, meeting Gowhar, tears, laughter, regrets, lessons learnt, fears overcome, friendships cemented, reality checks, and much more - so many powerful moments packed into the three wonderful years I spent here. This is where I spent some of the most important years of my life, a city I missed immensely and craved to go back to. A place I wanted to embrace and make my own. Mumbai.

Though I had been meeting you briefly throughout my life, I only got acquainted with you in 1999 when I joined college. Within the first month I was hooked. I never knew a city could be alive and take a personality of its own. As months passed we developed a bond, an unspoken and nameless bond. You accepted me for who I am and helped me find my identity. Far from restricting me, you gave me wings to fly, let me learn from my mistakes and gave me friends and family to cushion my falls. Despite the polluted air, choked streets, poverty, and slums that make you unhappy, you gave me the air of freedom to breathe, ample space to run and play, obstacles to make me strong and opportunities to find success and of course, even love.

I’m looking out the window and smiling. I had my doubts about coming back to you. Today, I am not the same girl who reluctantly left you in 2002. I’m married, I have a daughter, my priorities have changed, my ambitions and dreams are not the same. I’m a bit wiser, I don’t trust that easily, and I’m over cautious. But I’m still over sentimental about things, I still love Juhu beach morning walks, pani-puris, linking road haggling, the monsoon rains, the adrenaline rush of travelling in the local trains. Sigh. I’ve missed you. But now I’m back. Back against my will. I didn’t know how badly I needed this. I should learn to stop questioning destiny. I’m being taken care of. Your streets may look different, parts of you may have got a facelift, but its still you. The same embrace I left years ago. Thank you, Mumbai. Thank you for being you.

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